Awaiting Inspiration

Butterfly

The days are passing so quickly and as I hold my breath waiting for it slow down, I find my lungs on fire, ready to burst. The world is not slowing around me. Every chakra in my body has blockages. The root to solar plexus are so bogged down that barely an energy is trickling past it.

Symptoms that no longer serve me:
Lower back and sciatic problems
Indigestion, Acid reflux, and other stomach issues
Jaw pain / possible TMJ
Semi-frequent headaches
Low self worth
Social Anxieties
Getting stuck in circles of painful thoughts
Discomfort at being in this body
Wanting to stop existing when things get tough
Blaming myself for everything that goes wrong in the world

Energy has stagnated and I can feel the painful tug in my tailbone. The ache in my hip flexors. I don’t want to move because so much of my body aches. But not moving also hurts. It’s time to find alignment.

There is hope.

Some joys that have been healing:
Small moments in between breaths
Resting my head on my boyfriends chest as he holds me
Nestling deep into his arms so that all I feel is warmth and safety
Laughing at little things – stupid cartoons and silly faces
Looking up at the tops of trees and watching birds fly by
Closing my eyes and turning my face to direct sunlight
Watching butterflies fluttering over flowers
Knowing that I deserve love, even in the moments I doubt it

There are two sides to every coin. I am in pain and avoiding the present. I am hopeful and learning to cherish the present. I want to stay on the path this time. I want to truly heal myself. Go in deep. Find the energy and let it pour through me. I await the inspiration.  ❤

 

 

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